You know the saying God is my co-pilot? Sometimes, not often, the co=pilot has to take the wheel. He took the wheel from me. God showed up. I know He's been here with me all along; there's not enough space on the Internet for me to list the miracles I've witnessed in my life. In this particular circumstance He jumped up and out and showed Himself plain.
*For my friends and followers who don't believe in God re-read the caveats of my earlier post. It's not that I don't respect your opinion, but this is MY story.
In a limp hearted effort to get the ball rolling again I sent an email to the coordinator with whom I'd been working. I guess I could/should have done something more direct -- like make a phone call, but looking back now I know I was still fearful and timid at the time and an email was the best I could do. I guess it was around Match 8, 2011. Ellen responded to my email a few days later (so we're at what? the 10th?) with a simple message -- call the office, and make an appointment -- why hadn't I thought of that? (Ohhh... I remember, fear.) I called made an appointment with the dreaded Dr. Davis. I can say honestly here the dread was because I knew that I hadn't filled my part of the bargain - I had lost some of the required weight, been approved by both the surgeon and the insurance company all that was left for ME to do was to meet with the psychologist, cardiologist and complete a sleep study. I was approved in June 2010. This was March 2010. So yes, I dreaded meeting with Dr. Davis.
My appointment with Dr. Davis was eventful and noteworthy. He had a few points to make, and he sure did make them. He read me the riot act. I could tell he was annoyed and disappointed. No real skills of discernment on my part were needed. He told me so very clearly and in no uncertain terms.
"I am disappointed. This is the problem with the morbidly obese. They are non=compliant!"
I took it all in. What could I say?
And I asked my question clearly - "Do I have to start again with all of the screenings? Or can I re-start the process from here?"
"Start from here? No. You have to start again. What did you think? You have to start all over again from day one. It's not me. (I think it was him.) It's the insurance company."
He asked the insurance expert. In order to underscore his point he brought her back to see me and asked one question - "does she have to start over?"
She said with no hesitation, "Yes."
I don't know what that was to prove. He was her boss right? If I were her I would agree with him too at that point. DAYEM! He was fired up! The day was March 14 2011
I left his office and was on my cell phone making the call to to the nutritionist. This was the first, but certainly not the last time God would clearly take the wheel. I was not living in the disappointment of the moment as I normally would. If I had to start over again, this is where I needed to start, and what I needed to do. Wait here for a second folks because God wasn't satisfied with taking the wheel, He was about to show out! When I called the nutritionist she said "Ms. Abrams, to be perfectly honest I don't think you have to start all over again. I'm pretty sure your 90 day nutrition counseling is good for a year. Connect with your coordinator to be sure. If you do, call me back." She transferred me to my coordinator Ellen for whom I left a message. And then I called her directly (outside of my character again, but this wasn't just me alone in this.) and she picked up! Ellen said, "Ms. Abrams! I was just looking at your file, and listening to your message. I have to tell you, I don't think you have to start from the beginning. Let me see."
Long pause.
Ellen: "Hmm.. did you do your cardiac screening?"
Me: "No."
Ellen: "Did you do the sleep study?"
Me: "No."
Ellen: "OK. Did you do the psych eval?"
Me: "Errr... Ummm... No."
Ellen: "Oh OK. So let's do this, I will send your file to the insurance company to get their approval. You call me in a few days and I will let you know where you stand."
Me: "OK Ellen sounds like a plan."
Before we hung up Ellen says "Ms. Abrams I have to tell you it's a good thing you called us again today because you know what I know for sure is that your nutrition counseling is good for a year. You saw Dr. Davis for the first time March 18 2010. If you had waited a few more days. I could say for SURE you would have to start again!"
What??? WHAT??? WHAT??? WHAT???
Come on people this was not chance, this was not circumstance, this was not coincidence. I am just saying... this could only be God at work. And I recognized Him showing His hand. And like that (poof) I decided to stop acting out of fear, and I decided to walk in faith.
He hadn't shown his full hand. God was not yet done with lil' ol' me.
Stay tuned...
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